Hailee Steinfeld Didn't Take My Wedding Advice
Plus: More merch is here!
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Well, it doesn’t look like Hailee Steinfeld took my wedding advice.
A few months ago, I wrote about how all athlete weddings look the same.
I spent way too much time looking at way too many weddings across way too many professional sports leagues to confirm my suspicions that they all either: A: Have the same wedding planner (Hello Mindy Weiss) B: Share the same Pinterest board or C: Just really like white flowers compressed into highly compacted displays with greenery peaking through.
I thought maybe Steinfeld and her now-husband, Buffalo Bills quarterback Josh Allen, would take my advice and go a different direction, but I wasn’t hopeful.
If you recall, Allen proposed to Steinfeld last November with a compressed floral arch (not white flowers, however!) on a cliff overlooking the ocean.
Flash forward to last Saturday, Steinfeld and Allen tied the knot at the San Ysidro Ranch in Montecito, California.
I did peg them as more of a Rosewood Miramar couple, but alas.
Immediately, when I saw this DailyMail photo, I knew that the couple did not, in fact, read my Substack.
That arrangement of white roses on the ground was not a great sign…
And when I saw their ceremony shot….I hung my head in defeat.
So! Many! Compressed! White! Flowers!
Am I disappointed? Yes. With that sort of floral budget, they could’ve done something truly incredible!
Am I biased towards the Los Angeles-based florist for my chic driveway wedding, Puni Petals, who delivered the most insane bouquet I’ve ever seen??? Perhaps...
And listen: I am all for simplicity, but a giant floral arch with flowers shoved in there like an L train at rush hour is not simple.
It’s stressful!
I have a lot more to say on this topic, but I’ll save that for this week’s episode of
which drops later today…🛍️More Merch Is Here!🛍️
After selling out of my Sports Gossip Enthusiast hat twice, I decided to launch a new design: Happy Hippie Dippy! In! Two! Colors!
You can pre-order either (or both) below:
I also recieved a lot of messages about wanting to purchase the Sports Gossip Enthusiast hat and…it’s back in a new color! This will also be a pre-order just FYI.
Paying subscribers get a discount on merch—and an update on where that Knicks-themed lingerie is from that Kylie Jenner posted on her Instagram Story, among other things below.
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