The Best Sports Merch Movie Moments Of All Time
According to me, at least.
If Bravo and ESPN had a baby, it would be Impersonal Foul. This newsletter is free, but consider becoming a paying subscriber for $6/month to support the work that I’m doing.
For partnership inquiries or to just say hello, email madeline@impersonalfoul.com
For no reason other than I felt like it, and I don’t have an editor telling me otherwise, we’re diving into one of my favorite silly topics: Actors wearing sports merch in movies.
There are four rules for this:
No low-hanging fruit. Only deep cuts.
NO SPORTS MOVIES. I would not waste your time with something as obvious as The Rockford Peaches (A League of Their Own). Don’t get me wrong: I love those uniforms as much as the next person, but that’s way too easy.
No movies where a sports franchise is a major plot device. Ex. The Boston Red Sox in Fever Pitch or The Philadelphia Eagles in Silver Linings Playbook. Again, Too! Easy!
No fake teams. Sorry Tune Squad.
Make sense? Okay, let’s dig in…
6. Kevin Garnett’s 2008 Boston Celtics championship ring in Uncut Gems
This movie stressed me out. I loved it, but I felt the same way I do when I watch the occasional horror film. No! Jump! Scares! Please! That pacing was anxiety-inducing, but it was a masterclass in acting, directing and editing.
Kevin Garnett might have given the best performance after Adam Sandler. I loved Julia Fox duh, but there was something about Garnett that captivated me.
You cannot tell me that the film had the best use of a championship ring prop since the 1984 Dolphins AFC Championship Rings in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.
When Sandler pawned the ring, I was literally yelling, “No! Don’t do it!”
5. Carol Anne’s Los Angeles Rams helmet in Poltergeist
This was from the *first time* they were the Los Angeles Rams. Who can keep track? I certainly can’t and don’t care to!
I love the use of the helmet in this movie. It is not just random costuming but an actual prop that adds vibes to the scene. It also looks so cute on Heather O’Rourke!
Plus, this is the fun part: When the ghosts are chill cool ghosts before stuff takes a turn. Like I said, I hate horror movies.
There is also some dark lore about this movie involving a Super Bowl poster from the future, but I will let you Google that. I am too superstitious to discuss Poltergeist lore publicly.
Moving on…
4. Doug MacRay’s New York Mets hat in Gone Girl
Doug MacRay is Ben Affleck’s character in The Town. In Gone Girl, he plays Nick Dunne.
In reality, isn’t Affleck kind of doing Doug MacRay in most of his movies??? Don’t ask me to elaborate. Joe Mazzulla agrees.
Anyway! This hat makes the list for its behind-the-scenes drama. The rumor was that production shut down for four days because director David Fincher wanted Affleck to wear a Yankees hat in the scene.
Affleck—a diehard Red Sox fan—refused and walked off-set. They compromised on the Mets hat.
Gone Girl co-star Carrie Coon later shut down rumor, but the Mets-hat-instead-of-Yankees-hat part does appear to be true. Poor Mets!
They’ve been so awful for so long and are the, “Ughhhh fine I want to wrap so I can prepare for Batman” team.
3. The Yankee hat extra watching Meg Ryan do her fake orgasm in Katz’s Deli in When Harry Met Sally
From NO THANKS Yankees hat to YES PLEASE Yankees hat. The first time I realized this unassuming restaurant goer closest to Ryan in the background, I yelped.
I love the idea that this guy was just having a Reuben talking about the Yankees home vs. away record when suddenly, some lady starts screaming and writhing around one table over.
I don’t have many notes for Nora Ephron, but the Yankee hat extra guy should have been the one to say, “I’ll have what she’s having” imo.
2. Darby Shaw’s New York Knicks hat in The Pelican Brief
Julia Roberts in this hat makes me weak!!! Just ask
. The two-tone! The Giant K! The too big for her head fit! The bun tucked all the way under! The messy bend of the brim, like it had been shoved in a suitcase!There’s just something beautifully pre-internet about 90s Julia mixed with 90s Knicks.
Roberts. Ewing. Starks. Mason. Oakley.
I! Am! Here! For! It
1. Axel Foley’s Detroit Lions bomber in Beverly Hills Cop
What can I say? This is the pinnacle of pinnacles. Sports merch Mt. Everest.
I don’t know where Eddie Murphy begins and the jacket ends. I swear his endless charisma poured into the pockets, and they merged into one perfect crime-fighting being. It’s iconic!
Plus, the Lions could win the Super Bowl this year. If they make it and somebody pays
and I to go to New Orleans, I might have to get one…If Bravo and ESPN had a baby, it would be Impersonal Foul. This newsletter is free, but consider becoming a paying subscriber for $6/month to support the work that I’m doing.
You can follow me on Instagram here, Twitter here and TikTok here. Enjoy the endless void of content!
This is such a niche but brilliant topic. I will go to the grave insisting KG should have been nominated for best supporting actor for Uncut Gems. He is not an actor!!! He was incredibly convincing!!!
Really enjoy the pin game on that Axel Foley Lions jacket as well. Detroit Tigers, Red Wings, Lions, what looks like a second Lions pin and TBD on top right... but I mean, maybe Pistons? Oh no, stop me before I investigate the pins on Axel's jacket.