Everything Adele's Boyfriend Posted Besides Adele
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If the Bravo Cinematic Universe and ESPN had a baby, it would be Impersonal Foul. You in? Subscribe and tell your friends.
I’m sorry I’ve been MIA from writing these silly little newsletters. I got engaged and have been planning a wedding. Let me tell you…Wedding! Planning! Is! Not! Like! What! You! See! On! TikTok! Honestly, it should be a sport recognized by the NCAA.
What have we missed since I’ve been spending hours on end researching flowers?
The no. 1 seed, The Phoenix Suns, lost by…a lot.
Tom Brady went back to work.
And Naomi Osaka has a new salad.
We’re not here to discuss any of these issues. We’ll save those for another newsletter. Today we’re here to discuss some breaking news: Adele posted a Camera Roll Dump of her boyfriend—leading with a photo of the pair holding keys…Hrmm….
If you don’t remember from my first explainer on Mr. Rich Paul, let me fill you in. He’s the CEO and Founder of Klutch Sports Group and the head of UTA Sports. While those are just his LinkedIn hits, you probably know him as LeBron James’ BFF and…as Adele’s boyfriend.
I’ve been obsessively stalking Paul’s Instagram to see *his* version of the Camera Roll Dump, but have yet to see a ‘gram in sight!
In case you don’t believe me, here’s some of the things Paul has shared instead of a Camera Roll Dump of his girlfriend or a comment on her Instagram post. Enjoy! This! Nonsense!
Coastal Elite Media Twitter News
No one cares about Hollywood Reporter/Deadline/Variety headlines more than the Coastal Elite/Media Twitter. For the record, I am including myself in this group!!!
Paul felt it was necessary to post some news about a Twitch star, but didn’t feel it was necessary to share Adele’s in-feed post to his Story??? This man was active on the platform the day Adele’s post went live and he said No! To! The! Camera! Roll! Dump!
Free #Spon Con
Paul kicked backed and relaxed…while posting Lobos 1707, the tequila line he founded with James.
But Paul did *not* kick back and relax while posting any photos of Ms. Adele!
Pull Quotes
Paul found the time to post a quote from one of Klutch Sports’ clients—but didn’t find the time to write a sweet caption from Adele!
As of writing this, Paul has yet to comment on the Instagram post or share anything to his Story.
Listen, I wouldn’t be bringing this nonsense up if Paul wasn’t active on Instagram, but after presenting exhibits A-C, you can see that’s not the case.
Whatever the reason, I would love to be a fly on the wall in Adele’s group text with Sophia Bush’s friends or at the group dinner with James, Adele, and Paul where I *know* the planning of that post must’ve been discussed.
Since I haven’t been invited to the group chat or gotten a reservation at Mother Wolf, I’ll be over here listening to Adele’s greatest hits, refreshing some man’s Instagram Story while he post things that are meant for LinkedIn. Smh.
DeuxMoi Sporty Spottings
Maybe Magic Johnson should return from vacation early to deal with the mess that is the Los Angeles Lakers.
Escooter championship?! I’ll see myself out now.
Other Pointless Sports Gossip
Lil Wayne with the tea!
A Patrick Beverly explainer is coming based on this exchange alone.
Who let the dogs out!!!
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Thank god someone finally said something. Not even a birthday Story? Feels pointed